I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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