Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
PANTIES FOUND
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
