..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
