I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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