i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize