Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
