We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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