right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize