I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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