She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
