Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
