...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
