Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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