I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize