North Korea, Best Korea!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
