There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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