Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
