Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
