Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
