Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
