Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
