i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Randomize