they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
