Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
