is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
