And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
