Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
