We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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