I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
