im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Randomize
