Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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