I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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