so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
