this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
