Plan B is the new Plan A
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
We need to rekindle our bromance
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
