My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
