My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
