Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
