oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
