I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
