If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
You are the jesus of drinking
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
