I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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