After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
