how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
No subtext here. People are naked.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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