Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
As shirtless as possible
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
