Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
