this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize