well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
