are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
