is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
